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How to Stop Caring About Others’ Negative Opinions of You

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Your skills and abilities merit profound appreciation; you must therefore place yourself in an environment where you will be so appreciated, and not subject to the negative opinions of others. People tend to believe the negative information that they hear about themselves. A work situation where you are unappreciated will tax your two greatest assets, your self-worth and your sanity.

The Power of Perceptions

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Perceptions matter more than facts; others’ perceptions of you, your perceptions of others, and how you control both are the most important aspects of your career. Realize the power of perceptions in your life and use them to your advantage. Aim to control and shape the perceptions that others hold about you by shaping the image that you project to the world.

See Your Job and the World from the Bright Side and Not the Dark Side

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Avoid people with a negative worldview, and who are unenthusiastic about their jobs. Their negative energy will rub off on you if you allow it, and you will find yourself experiencing the same negative results and unhappiness as them. Seek out people who are succeeding and doing great things in their careers, and who love what they do. Learn to view your job and surroundings from the light rather than the dark side.

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Patron Tequila, Guns & Roses and Seeing and Doing What Others Do Not

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The Importance of Fitting In

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The ability to fit into your work environment is among the most important parts of obtaining and retaining a job, even more so than your skill level. Fitting in means nothing more than being comfortable in one’s work environment, and making others similarly comfortable. Employers want to hire people who will embrace their approach to business and the world on physical and moral levels, so you must strive to fit in with their worldview.

Bullies and Your Career

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Your ability to defend yourself against bullies will determine your odds of long-term success in any career. Bullies throw other off balance by making them feel uncomfortable over time, establishing a power dynamic between themselves and their victims. Bullies exist throughout the business world, and once you learn to identify them you can avoid problems by simply choosing not to play their game.

Your Forces and How to Use Them

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Love Your Work and the People Who Give It to You

Advancement 23
In this article Harrison discusses the importance of loving your work and also the people who give you work. Work is the most important thing you can have. Without work, everything stops. So respect the work you are doing. Having work is a privilege and this work can lead to more work. You need to respect people who give you work and you need to get work at all costs. It is never good to be without work. Being without work means your skills and value do not currently have a place. Do the work to the best of your ability. The only way to advance is by doing good work and exceeding expectations. Doing good work is crucial to our lives. Make the most of your job and give it your all. The harder you work, the higher you will climb.

Do Not Allow the Past to Limit Your Opportunities Today

How to Succeed 6
For most of us, our limited understanding of the past can in turn limit our future opportunities; looking at the future as defined by your past experiences is among the most destructive things that you can do. Instead, look very closely in your life and determine how your past opinions may be limiting your current situation, and change those opinions.

Understand the Nature of People, Jobs and the Environments You Commit To

Getting Ahead 1
Several years ago a long-term relationship I was in ended and I felt absolutely terrible: the person I was with could not stop fraternizing with other men. At least a few times a week, she would be out with a different man and say it was related to work. We lived together and she would come home late – sometimes she would make excuses that she was staying with friends and would not come home at all. Eventually, I was so angry about this all the time that the relationship ended.

Being Against Something – and Your Job Search

Finding a Job 20
You can better market yourself by taking a stand against something. Peoples’ personal beliefs, including the things with which they do not agree, define who they are as people. Standing against something differentiates you from the crowd; when done in the correct manner, without disrespecting others’ opinions, such a stance can help you land your dream job.

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Keeping a Job

Your Job Is a Game-Make Your Opponents External

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In this article Harrison explains how you can ensure success in your career by externalizing your opponents. Your job is like a game; if you work hard, play by the rules of the company and are seen as part of the team you will be viewed as a valuable player for the company. The most significant part of any game is the presence of an opponent. Don’t look for an opponent among your co-workers. Never speak negatively of your team members. Instead, concentrate on the external opponents. External opponents bring you and the team closer as you work towards a common goal. In order for you and your company to succeed it is important to have an external opponent. Harrison advises people to consistently work hard and not participate in the politics. This is a sure way to score big in your career.

Getting Ahead

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Staying Positive

Self-Esteem and Lunch Room Tables

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True self-esteem comes from within, not from the acceptance of others. When your sense of worth comes from within, you free yourself from comparisons with others and will enjoy a greater sense of internal security. You will no longer be bogged down by the experiences of others and can become much more self-reliant.

Take Small Actions and Meet Others

Staying Positive 1
Your greatest successes will come from some of the smallest actions in terms of meeting people. You will cause a “stacking effect” the more you meet and connect with people; conversely, people cannot connect with you when you are withdrawn and nothing will happen. You must do everything in your power to connect with as many people as possible.

The Importance of Your Sense of Self

Getting Ahead 22
A powerful sense of self will make all the difference in your life. You must understand that your sense of yourself and your capabilities come from inside of you, not from the external forces that have brought you to your current place in life. What you feel internally might be completely different from what the world is telling you, and you must learn to focus on the former rather than the latter.

Sick Crows, Your Attitude, and Being on the Winning Team

Staying Positive 7
Adopting a positive attitude will always bring you closer to success, as nobody wants to be associated with a losing side. Everyone wants to associate with and hire winners, and avoids losers. Nothing is more important than maintaining a positive attitude, as many employers hire people based primarily on attitude; with the right attitude, everything else will fall into place. You must look like you are on the winning team, even if times are tough; nobody wants to hire a loser.

Emotions and Our Careers

Getting Ahead 2
Everyone tries to maintain a certain emotional state, and learning to control your own emotions will have a profound impact on your career. While everyone allows their emotional states to be influenced by outside events, there is no advantage in basing your own emotions on things that you cannot control. Allow yourself to discover happiness and fulfillment naturally, rather than making your emotions dependant on external circumstances. Your outlook will have a tremendous impact on your psychological health, as well as that of those around you.

About us

Harrison Barnes is an entrepreneur, thought leader in the legal placement space, legal recruiter and the #1 legal career company leader in the United States.

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Eliot Spitzer’s Lessons: Finding Strength in Your Dark Side

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When you try to mask or suppress aspects of your personality, those traits will inevitably come to the fore anyway. You need to develop a comprehensive understanding of yourself, including your darker or deeply buried traits; once you know how your dark side limits and controls you, the better you will do in your life and career. Self-discovery will ultimately lead to inner peace, which in turn will enable you to more fully develop your goals.

Self-Esteem and Lunch Room Tables

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True self-esteem comes from within, not from the acceptance of others. When your sense of worth comes from within, you free yourself from comparisons with others and will enjoy a greater sense of internal security. You will no longer be bogged down by the experiences of others and can become much more self-reliant.

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The number one thing that makes people fail and not reach their potential is competition. If get into an area where there is not much competition and you genuinely have something to offer, you will succeed. Everyone is successful to the extent they are doing something others around them are not that provides value.

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Never Measure Yourself against Perfection

Life Lessons 47
Use your past, rather than some unattainable ideal, as the yardstick for measuring progress in your life and career. The most successful people are also often the most unhappy, because they measure themselves against impossible ideals, which causes a constant sense of inferiority. There will always be someone better than you, and there are ideals all around you against which it would be unrealistic and stupid to measure yourself. Instead, compare yourself only to the person you were before; measure yourself against your own progress, and forget about others.

Concentrate on Your Contribution

Employment Do’s and Don’ts 41
In this article, Harrison explains the secret behind successful people and the biggest difference between them and those who fail to grow. Most people fail to succeed because they constantly evaluate the rewards they get rather than direct their efforts towards solid constructive work. Successful people on the other hand, are always focused on their work, concentrated on their contributions, and dedicated towards generating value. Unlike others, they do not think about the rewards and are highly passionate about the work they are doing. This characteristic Harrison believes, is what leads to a person’s growth and success.

Sympathy, Morale, and the Importance of Being Organized

How to Succeed 39
Sympathy destroys morale, and those who can walk away from sympathy often have better careers and make better use of their skills. Good organization is the most effective means of upholding high morale and productivity. Well-organized groups and companies are much harder for people to undermine, and their strength is directly linked to their organization.

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